what made it doa from the start was that i could not overcome the words and accusations.
it was me who knew it was not right to revive the marriage. i couldn't bring myself to be nice to him because i felt like i was being nice to someone who treated me like crap.
i agree that we were both responsible for the breakdown of the marriage. but the damaged caused after the d-bomb was unbearable for me. i didn't feel it was justified. i understand that hurt people do/say hurtful things. but it was relentless to the point where there wasn't an inkling of remorse.
he bought a house. and went all out on the upgrades. in typical was script, it was well planned, way ahead of time. i saw the signs. he wasn't going to be swayed. he avoided me not because he was ashamed of what he said or did. but because he despises me. (i know, i bought a house too because i have to find a place to live, not for emotional reasons).
he wrote a lengthy email to his lawyer on how unfair things were for him. he is continuing to fight me on money.
maybe we are too different. maybe money is the apple of his eye. i can't compete with money. money gives him some level of satisfaction that i can't give.
it was over when we sold our house. he took my house key in an attempt to lock me out so he can claim abandonment. he wanted to claim the house to himself. i had personal items stolen from me while i was out. trust was damaged beyond repair.
it was hard for me to want to be nice to someone who was plotting to take my life savings away from me. for what? because i hurt his feelings? what about mine? at some point, i matter in this sitch.
