25yearsmlc, I sincerely apprecitiate you taking the time to write the long post with great advice. Up to this point my emotions have been my biggest problem. I agree, I REALLY need to set her free, so I can free my mind. It's painfully clear that there is NOTHING I can do. Your absolutely right, I have to let go and move on with my life with my babies, because I do have no choice. Staying calm is key now for my own sanity, and focusing less / not at all on this issue is best for the kids. THEY deserve my undivided attention, they deserve my love!
BTW I discussed custody with my W. I did not want to have to drop them off at her house to a sitter until she got home from work, because I don't think the daily moving is good for them. Besides they'd just sleep there until she got up to just bring them to school. My sister will be moving in temporarily (year or so), to assist, until I am first shift. I just needed someone to be at my home while they sleep. My wife agreed that my proposal was best for the kids, even though she said she will miss them. So now the kids will sleep at my house 5-6 days out of the week, my sis will get them ready for school, wife will pick up and be responsible the baby and issues regarding the other kids if something come up while their in school from 7a-2p. She will have them all day 1-2 days per week. Only catch is, even though I'll have the kids the majority of the time and doing the majority the parenting, she wants my lawyer to put it in writing that it will still be consisted 50/50 custody & placement, so she won't have to pay me and she'll still get paid child support (because she makes less). I don't care about the money, I want my kids.
I just got my W off of the joint account, so I plan to purchase the DB & DR books... I'm sure I'll learn some good skills to use later even if we don't reconcile. I will locate and read "Setting Free"
