Your H is finding that he is enjoying being back in your company and good graces. THIS SCARES HIM...He did not expect to find himself in this place again.
I agree. He initiates as much as I do nowadays. He's more reliant on me for advice. He's comfortable...the day at swimming was a great example.
Originally Posted By: Sanderika
HE IS TRYING TO PUSH YOU AWAY with the talk of the divorce once again AND the mention of moving in with OW.
Yes, yes......push me away and keep the distance....give some more time. This is an ongoing game but the time span has changed. Three years ago it was warmer, warmer, oh oh too close, explosion, distance for weeks. Now it's warmer, warmer, oh oh too close, gentle push back, attempts to reposition and distance but quick to return. I think ow is almost a protection for him as well. She's his excuse for not getting too close to me.
Originally Posted By: Sanderika
I know your H loves you very deeply, the only thing keeping him moving forward is his pride along with a heavy dose of fear.
H tells me he loves me as a friend. That's a HUGE acknowledgement. Fear....guess so.
Originally Posted By: Sanderika
I hear him say "divorce is only a piece of paper". IMO, It's not!! A divorce is a state of being generally where one spouse wants to be free of the other. A divorce does not have to be permanent, but more often than not it becomes so. A divorce is painful. A divorce causes animosity and hatred even if those feelings were not in place at the beginning.
I agree but if I think about it H and I were more divorced 3 years ago than now. He has a point. The slate is clear.
Thanks again Sanderika. I appreciate the time and energy you give to posting. Your warmth and integrity glow like a beacon.
