How should I handle MLC direct lying?

[ericmsant2]

Amg,

I like what Grit posted to you. Think about it.

As for when is enough enough – that is for YOU to decide. Here is what I think….and FTR, I’m just some Rican that lives in CT so WTF do I know.

No I haven't forgiven him.

Forgiveness is provided when you are no longer THAT angry. Forgiveness frees YOU from these feelings. Now, am I not gonna tell you that you will “forget” – no you will not, especially if you do not want to forget.

Anger and Hurt…

It is hard to make the RIGHT decision when you are angry. When your decisions are based on YOUR anger as opposed to what you truly feel in YOUR heart, they tend to be…well…not the greatest decisions. Personally, I think you should make a decision when feel that you are at a place of peace and not so angry.

Amg, FTR, I know of the anger that I see in your post. Chit, I still get pissed off from time to time, so a little anger here or there is really okay – actually it is quite healthy. But it is anger none the less.

And yes I definitely contributed negatively to our M

AND what have you done to correct these things?

I'm not sure what else because I'm NC

And what are YOU doing with this time? Are you really trying to forgive? Are you really working on yourself?

a lot of people here at standing for their M

I would not agree with this. Some are just living and healing. Standing…well it depends on what your definition of standing is. So let me ask you amg what does standing mean to YOU?

He has one cell EA 7 years ago. I found semi nude pictures of him and a girl he picked up in a bar one night on our camera 5 years ago. 8 months ago I discovered that he had given his cell number to someone he met through work and they had he says an EA but it seems VERY unlikely it wasn't also a PA. AND to boot...he had an in depth texting EA with a minor.

Does any of this change how you want to live your life and the type of person that you want to be?

I mean really….my W had an EA and PA and honestly I am not sure she ended the PA – guess what? None of that changes who I am as a person.

I could CHOOSE to….

sit here and dwell on it (and FTR, sometime I still do think about it),
be pissed off
begin to resent her OR…

I can Choose to sit here
and ask God to touch my heart
Ask God to help me see where I went wrong and help me change it,
Ask for forgiveness in my heart,
Ask for peace in my life

I know what I have choosen.

The really cool thing…Is that I finally reached a place where I understand that I get to make the choices of HOW I live my life. I was only able to realize this when I began to work on the anger.

The problem is...he's not a player. He's not an egotistical jerk. He is ABSOLUTELY not the guy you would think would do this stuff. He's sick. He needs help. He hates himself. But he can't/won't see any of that b/c he thinks I made him do this stuff somehow.

What does the word Crisis mean to YOU?

I'm still a bit unsure about whether to tell him to send the list of items he wants. I don't really want the list at this point...

Stop for a second and try not to be so angry and then think about what is the “right” thing to do.

But I'm not financially secure (house) until I do file. What a mess.

Sticking this out because of finances is not the right choice IMO.

Do you think that you can serve two masters?

Finances

Love

Decide what you want for YOUR life AMG.

Then stick to it.