I've read your posts and I am in the same situation. My wife has been gone for 4 months. We have a daughter and I am not wired to be a part time dad, either. My wife filed for divorce in August. Her family all does the same thing - run when it gets tough instead of working through it. The majority o them - all divorced - her dad twice. She said she would never do this to our daughter because she knows of the pain it causes children. She too may have interest in OM (but can't confirm and I don't really think so) But I know I made the mistakes in our marriage - no infidelity - mainly neglecting her and then us arguing all the time. She believes she is doing what is best for our daughter now. When she communicates it is mainly by text.
Anyway, thats a little of my background. Here is what I have been doing and you can see if it applies for you. At first, I was pursuing an being clingy - not attractive. She wanted nothing to do with me - no communication whatsoever. Then I started DB. Went "dark" and worked on myself - or at least best I could considering our daughter. W began softening up to me and communicating - met for lunch, invited me for dinner at where she is staying (as we are not living together), stopped talking about divorce, etc. Things seemed to be opening up for a couple of weeks there. However, I was being needy in front of my daughter when I had her, unintentionally, and she was saying things to W which my W then called and said it was the last straw and filed. At that point I went back to my old ways and completely began chasing, pursuing, buying gifts, being clingy, pleading, etc. What a complete turn off to her. So, about a week and a half ago I reread DB and my journal. Went back to following the advice of LRT. Taking care of self, daughter when I have her, etc. After being dark again - W asked to meet at where she is staying to go over some things. She offered to go with me to the store, gave me a kiss when I left, and said "thank you." She has not pushed for me to sign divorce agreement.
Now I've got to be dark again and not get too pushy or she will get cold feet and run away. Anyway, this is my sich and thought it might help as I have a familiar sich.
Its the toughest thing I've ever been through in my life. There are times I feel like completely giving up. so, I understand. But I am determined to save my family.
