cheated on, lied to, and now I am moving on

[mishka422]

ICK! Feel better soon sweetie!

[awest1217]

Been a long weekend. Grocery shopped on Friday and then that got cut short because my mom called to ask if my step-sister could borrow a coat. I like to grocery shop now without S because with coupons and watching prices, I am saving about $25 a month that I normally wouldn't.

Saturday...
Took my car in to get fixed and all the dealer did was say what codes it has and that is it because GM hasn't told the dealers what codes go with the recall and what the fix is so I am stuck knowing my car has problems, but not being able to get it fixed and GM and the dealer know this because I went through GM to get the appointment and STILL NOTHING DONE!

H comes to pick-up S and tells me what I should do. I told him that I am doing all of that (after he told me the same thing 3 times and after he wouldn't decide the night before about whether he would pick S up at the dealer or at my house) and said if I get in a wreck GM will be paying. He said that is fine, but what if S or I get hurt or killed. I said that would be horrible, but he wouldn't care if I got killed. He didn't like that too much and I shouldn't have said it, but I am finally a little angry so that is good (didn't last long).

Then I worked for my church concession stand at the college game. I go to leave and try to call H and his phone is off. I call his house and he isn't there. I got home and gave him a stern talking too. I told him it is unacceptable for him to have S and not have a way for me to contact him. what if I was delayed? What if the car didn't start and I couldn't get home for a while? What if... S asked for him to stay that night and I told S no daddy needs to leave because mommy is not happy right now. H went with it and left. He later sent a text apologizing.

I really don't mind telling him when I am upset about things he does with S. I don't care about what he does on his own time, but with S not ok. I have never once ignored a text or phone call when I have S. I always have my phone and it is always on so there is no excuse.

I am feeling horrible right now and I have to leave in 30 min for church. I just couldn't sleep all night probably due to all the excitement from the day and all the anger between my car, working, and H. Today is to relax...well maybe after I vacuum and wash the floors and do laundry.

[ImprovedRomeo]

What kind of problems does your car have? just curious- I'm a gearhead. And what does your H want you to do about it?

As for not being available, it's actually quite the opposite for me. I don't care to take STBXW's calls when I have DD. If it's important she'll leave a message, text me or email me and I'll get back to her- and vice-versa. However, we do the swap at school so we hardly ever see eachother. It's just sort of a routine. The less interaction I have with STBXW the better I feel. Now when she has DD then I'll take her calls in case there's an emergency.

Hope you feel better and get to relax.

[awest1217]

I have a Pontiac Vibe and it will randomly stall or just not start. I believe they say it has something to do with the PCM. H just wants to make sure I get all the codes and everything before I left and make sure I found out a timeline and what they plan to do to help me. I had already listened to him say those things 3 times and had said nicely that I was planning on doing that already by the fourth time, I had had enough.

About calling, I don't call H when he has S. The only reason why I called yesterday is because he had text me 3 times wondering when i would get home from his AIM account. I was at the game and we had already agreed he would keep S for about 1 hour longer (drop off at 8 instead of 7). I was calling to let H know that traffic was really bad and my ETA on getting home. He didn't have his cell on and he wasn't at his parent's house so that is why I was upset. I didn't know if they were going to be waiting for an hour for me to get him. If they decided to go out somewhere until I got home. I had no idea and I was letting him know the exact time I would get home. Otherwise no big deal. This isn't the first time he has not had his cell on, but the first time when he had S. Usually it is when S wants to call H, and H doesn't answer. That is H's loss and not really my problem besides the fact S gets upset, but when I am trying to let H when I would be home answering his 3 text messages, and I get no answer. That is a problem.

[ImprovedRomeo]

Toyota issued a recall for this (since the Vibe is basically a Toyota Matrix):

http://media.gm.com/content/media/us/en/...0/Aug/0826_vibe

Did you get the recall letter?

They should know what needs to be done. PCM (powertrain control module) is basically the brains of the engine. It's a box with circuits etc. To change it should be a simple matter of unplugging it and plugging a new one and setting the various codes that need to be set- a couple of hours worth of work. However, the PCM is expensive (should be free to you due to the recall)and not usually stocked. I wonder if it would've been better if the customers were sent to Toyota dealerships as opposed to GM (since Pontiac is no longer).

[mishka422]

Hey! Thought I would pop you a line about a way to save even more on your groceries. It takes some effort and I'm more than happy to share my strategy with you to simplify it. I save an average of $25-$35 a week with coupons on top of the store sale.

You can check out Couponmom online for grocery lists that match sales with recent coupons. They key is making sure you get the Sunday paper every week (never skip one) and matching them with the sales. I had my stockpile to such a great point one time that I only bought bread, eggs, milk, and meats for several months. The supplementals were already in my pantry and storage space. It saved me a lot of money over time.

I use another site now that specializes in just the Southeast. I started this using thegrocerygame online but that is a pay site and I got good enough at it that I don't need to pay for the help anymore. That site is absolutely AWESOME and is nationwide.

[Lucky11too]

I definitely agree with you on the phone thing. Yes, you shouldn't be bugging or checking up on him and S while they're out (which you don't), but he should definitely have a way for you to contact him in case of an emergency or scheduling issue. That's why we have cell phones! In general, yes, give them their time together, but I think especially in our cases where our S's are so young and we are really the sole care giver that our S's know and our most confortable with, having a way for communication is vital!

I hope you are feeling better. These bugs going around right now are brutal!

[awest1217]

Romeo - Thanks. I have actually known about the recall since August 29, two days after it was issued. H got the letter on Wednesday and I took it in on Saturday. The reason we got the car is because it is a "Toyota" in disguise so I am sure Toyota could fix it quickly, but GM doesn't know what to do because of it being a Toyota engine and they got rid of Pontiac so they are fixing another companies mess up on a brand they got rid of and are dragging their feet. Hopefully tomorrow I will know more. I have already spent a whole day talking to GM so I know they know about this and they also made the appointment Saturday. I just was under the impression that they would fix it Saturday or at least could tell me when it would get fixed. URGH!

Lucky - Yeah I don't call except at the end if I am running late like yesterday. It is odd because H is the one who texts me the whole time.

Mishka - Thanks! Actually, my SIL got me started and she is awesome, but I don't have the time between S and work. She really likes hip2save.com so that is another site to check out. I get the paper every week and right now since i just started, I really try to work CVS for the good deals and reward bucks (SIL has had to make herself buy last minute things to be over a dollar). Then I look at the ad for Kroger and Walmart to get good deals on groceries. I look at Kroger's ad and circle what I need. From there I go to walmart and get the stuff at the cheapest place, and of course always with coupons. As I mentioned $30 this weekend! As I get more into it, I will look more at the websites, but for now just going small.

[mishka422]

Start small and keep going. It's so worth it to save so much. The southernsavers site I use actually gives menu ideas to match the sale so you don't feel like you're buying random stuff with nothing to do with it. Pretty nice.

The great thing about those lists is that you don't have to have time really (which I have absolutely NONE of!)...it simplifies it for you so you don't have to look at the ads.

I do the same thing. Go to the two grocery stores I use with the best coupon deals and then I get everything else I need at Walmart because it all averages 20-30 cents per item lower than the other stores when it's not on sale. LOVE IT! I always feel like I win when I leave the store instead of getting hosed. LOL

[awest1217]

I forgot to update on one small item. S has been sleeping in his own room everyday for a week. He is doing great! We had a rough week last week, but now he is back into the routine. He always asks to sleep with me, but i always make him go to his bed. I miss our cuddling time, but now I just make sure we sit and watch something for a little bit around 7 so we get to cuddle then. He did sleep with me on Friday and he was so excited. He said it was a mommy/S sleep over. I said yes it was and only because I missed him so much.

Text H today about picking or dropping of his parents table and chairs because I now have the set from my step-sister all set up and don't have space for two tables and honestly I don't want to keep storing stuff that they want back like their piano and all of H's junk (main reason I can't wait for the D to be finalized so H has a deadline and after that deadline I can just chuck his stuff and he can't say anything about it). I hate storing his stuff because his parents don't have room. I say kick out your grown son who has no bills to go and get a place to live. He makes enough to have a small house (if not for the trips to OH, FL, IL, MI with OW plus buying at least two new ipods and what else). I will try to fit the stuff in my Vibe and then just call his parents and drop it off some time this week.

Tomorrow going to my brother's for dinner, but the rest of the week is actually free. Friday S goes on a field trip to a pumpkin patch and this weekend I need to get some much needed yard work done, plus reappoalster (sp?) the chairs that came with the table. My step-sister redid them and she did not do a great job plus they are stained from the boys which is natural. Overall hopefully I can relax and sleep. I just can't relax to get good sleep. Here is trying.