"i'm just waiting it out."

Really?

"i broke my own rules over the weekend."

So.. what you are saying is you can be "Emotionally" provoked?

"i called the crisis counselor to help me stop."

Crisis C.

They are the ones with the blankets.. running over to put you out cause you are too stupid to... Stop. Drop. And Roll.

"i have not made my decision yet."

Still waiting.

Relax
Eat
Think
Act normal
React.. Smartly.
Do something different.
Emulate.
Do Work.

Lets get "RETARDED" in here.