Jin, found your post! Once again, I find myself completely relating to you. Are you sure we aren't married to the same man?
My WH is 45 and did the exact thing, living at home through college, moving in with his first W, then me, now OW. She isn't "living" there technically, but she moved back in with her parents when she left her H and is staying there the nights he doesn't have his kids or she has hers.
I fear that they won't wake up, but it's incumbent upon us to move forward in GAL, fix things we don't like about ourselves (or they didn't like that hold merit) and get our lives to an emotional place of stability.
The A our WH are having are unresolved issues they have. I know we both know it's not our fault. However, we can hope that while we are working on ourselves they will do the same. My biggest fear is that my H will fix himself while he's with her and she will get my happily ever after.
You are doing great! The NC has been helpful for me to gain the strength I've needed to get in a better place emotionally. I remember the days of crying over nothing, beating my steering wheel randomly while driving and getting lost in thoughts of H and OW. I don't cry often anymore. I only beat the steering wheel to the beat of songs (I do use pandora so I have control over what songs I hear because it's amazing how songs can take you back) and I've busied myself and found that I can go long periods of time w/out thinking about THEM.
I am still only in contact via email and ONLY regarding our S. I've told him all other correspondence needs to go through L.
I'm proud of you! You are a class act! You deserve to be treated as such!
Me:38 H: 45 OW:34 S:4 Bonus S: 12 and 16 2nd M for both Together 12 yrs M: 6 EA suspected: 5/10 confirmed: 7/2/10 Separated: 8/12/10
