The problem is my W gets her feelings hurt if I display anger or frustration, so I hold back emotion.
I think that's a cycle a lot of folks get stuck in CL.
I was the same way as your W. I'd be out of my mind waiting for my H to express his emotions - anger, frustration... anything! But when he did, I didn't know how to handle it. So I'd get hurt and defensive, thinking that he was blaming me (granted, sometimes he did; but sometimes he didn't), or that I was at fault for his upset feelings or something. As a result, he'd go and bottle up his emotions even more. Which would then make me even more incapable of learning how to handle him expressing emotions because he'd resist share them with me because of my reaction. It's a - what do they call it - a feedback loop or something?
So maybe it's not that your W doesn't want you to show your emotions; it's that she just doesn't know how to handle it when you do. IDK - just a theory - what do you think - does it seem to fit for you?
Last edited by FindingMyVoice; 10/09/1004:05 PM.
I cannot complain for not receiving from others, that which I've never asked them for.
