Originally Posted By: Pun
I think, thick headed me, that what you are trying to point out to me is that even after November 17th, after papers are signed, after the couch is split with a chainsaw, that there is still a possibility of R if I'm hanging in there for him. Right?


Partly right.

Yes in that after the date, before the date, during the date...

It is what it is Pun.

H is going to do what he is going to do.

He did what he did.

Stop looking at what he is not valuing in your life together.

Stop looking at what he is choosing to value today.

Stop looking at what he might choose in the future.

Stop looking at your NOT looking.(dark)

Choose what you want from who you are.

What do I see?

I see a strong willed woman who has been a rock for her family.

I see a caring mother, grandmother and W.

I see someone who can do whatever she wants when she decides it.

Right now you are letting others decide this for you.

Look at the bold in your statement.

You are still doing this FOR H? H is still doing things TO you.

Martyr?

Do you see your perspective?

If you do things for him and he continues down this path of craziness (which is very likely)

you will/are become resentful. Angry. Disapointed. Defeated.

Don't put that power in his hands.

Rather seize that power in yourself Pun.

I know this sounds all warm fuzzy Truegritter philosophy stuff...

I just don't know any other way to say it Pun. Maybe SA, PEI, Cat, and Brooklyn can help me say it better. I can only speak from my experience.

I keep asking you why you are here and you give me answers and they are the things I already know about you

All the great things you do for your Grands, kids, for H trying to get him help. I understand.

Go to the mirror. Look in it. I am serious Pun. Do it.

What do you see?

Are you going to let anyone tell you what you believe? What you choose in your life?

You are not a victim Pun. You are survivor.

So now

Do I have to write my questions again?

Why are you here standing?

What does love mean to you?


My goal is to some day be the person my dog thinks I am