You sound very similar to my W. I'll put it really clear for you so you can maybe understand the desperate LBS mentality.
Unless these words come out of your mouth, you're not going to get the space you need and his emotions be in check: "I love you, my dear H, and I want to be with you. I am going to be here and not leave you. But, I need some space while I'm here right now to work on myself. That doesn't mean I don't want to be with you - it just means I need to get some serious space to myself right now so I can make this M work. I'm not going anywhere."
Anything short of that, and he'll pressure.
I know.
Here is what I have said...
I care about you more than you know and I'm going to keep fighting for our family. Right now I have to fix me, I'm not strong enough to handle our M issues in the mental state that I'm in. I understand it's asking alot of you to wait and I can't promise where my thoughts will be when I get myself figured out. If you don't want to wait, that is your choice and I will accept it but I'm not going anywhere until my head is straight or you tell me to go. I'm just not of sound mind to make those big decisions. While I'm working on myself, I will try the best I can to fix our M but somethings are just too much right now. I'll be as honest as I can but I just need you to be patient.
So that's what I've said, over and over again. That's why the decision is his to make. I'm not ready to make the decision of I'm I DONE with my M. I'm just done with this pain I feel on a daily basis and something had to give...right now that's the M. But deep behind my walls, I don't think I'm done with us...at least I'm praying I'm not.
Doodi
"I feel like Rocky in the fifteenth round, beaten beyond recognition, when I realize, the only person I've been fighting for is...myself."
