Not sure where to start or end, WAW? - #3

[TimeHeals]

You're a pretty young guy, and she's a pretty young woman, so I'll cut you guys some slack, but this whole business is just a little... ummm ... err "unevolved".

I share my opinion pretty freely, but I don't share my beliefs that often, and I'm going to share one of them learned from a life time of bad choices: people with high integrity don't cheat, and they don't start dating until the divorce is final.

That's not too popular here. There are a lot of folks here whose spouses are cheating on them, have moved out, their divorce is in process, so they figure they will date, in part to "rebuild" their "self-esteem", but I believe this is all about their ego, and your ego is always going to be insecure (always), but the good news is that your ego (the part of you that is always thinking about the future and the past) is not YOU.

Likewise, you are more than your emotions which are very primal and which can feed your ego's insecurity, and then your ego can feed your emotions, and you can get into this compulsive downward spiral if you act on your emotions or confuse your whole indentity with your ego or your emotions.

This is why a set of more universal principles is a good thing to have: acting on your emotions or every fearful imagining or every regret is not a good way to conduct yourself, and people with HIGH integrity, good self-control, and who are confident tend to not date people with lower integrity, poorer self-control, and low self-esteem.

I really believe that. I believe if you have a good set of core principles and use those as your guide instead of acting on (often maladaptive) emotional patterns and every fear your mind can imagine and take time to appreciate the good things in life, your life will improve along with the people who are in it.