We just have to agree to disagree I really feel that I have nothing to give back to this board. I tried DBing just didn’t work, I read both books, I GAL my butt off, I made new friends, I let her go, nothing made her look back. DBing along with some other books made me feel better, I put on a fake shell that no one sees through, but its fake, tonight I took some stuff back to my kids after having them for a week, and started bawling like a baby driving home. Not crying for my wife, I don’t want her crying because I miss my kids. I hope and pray that if I ever get in another relationship (which with 4 young kids I kind of doubt that ever happens) it goes better than this one, but looking back on my marriage I have very few regrets about my actions I took care of my family, but still hope its not me that made my wife go crazy (for lack of a better term). My stbex is hot, I may have married up beyond what my unhandsome mug could keep interested I just don’t know. I have thousands of questions and very few answers. I act like I’m strong and over it but deep inside is a very scared little boy who is scared as heck, I know my kids come first, but would love to be able to talk to my dad so he could point me in the right direction. No offering advice is for people like coach and PDT who have there act together.
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You've done so many of the right things. You will bounce back from this. No doubt there are tough spots each and every day. Don't feel bad about the crying; we're all human, and it's not a sign of weakness.
Your wife has free will. She's done what she's done, and is responsible for that. Don't take ownership of her actions and mistakes. Own your own stuff!
