There you go again, saying what I'm thinking. I love my children more than I love myself sometimes. They are the reason my decision isn't cut & dry
I was....still am on the fence about this issue. I recall my W telling me the kids will be fine, their resilient, .....blah blah blah.
It hard with the kids...I feel I miss out on half their lives and well, I do. I only have them 50% if the time.
Continue to show your W you are not PLAN B. You are a PLAN A for someone. Getting your own apartment will show her you are OK with the outcome.
I feel now That since my W didn't use the kids as a reason to stay, I can't use that as a reason to reconcile. I believe it has to be for the right reasons. That's what I'm waiting and looking for.
You know the drill.
Hell, if my wife really wanted to reconcile, I'd have no problem with staying for the kids. She'd rather have us stay together "for the kids." Sorry hun, but I'm turning into a horrible father because I'm living in limbo, in a relationship that is totally unhealthy. Taking out my frustration on my two beautiful, innocent daughters.
Somehow she hopes that if we just stay together, things might change; though she swears she never had that "animal attraction" to me. That if we didn't have girls, she would have runaway...
I have to keep telling myself this. Remembering what she says and what she's said. I deserve and want a normal relationship.
Not right now. I know that some will disagree, but this is just a separation, nothing legal. She's fully aware that any debt she incurs while we're apart is something she'll be just as responsible for as I would.
And this has been written on paper or just by word of mouth? Because you know as long as you are M'ed, marital debt falls under both parties.
As for a free consult: google some in your area. It was so hard for me to find one but I did and I ended up retaining the guy!
Pin, what is Krav Maga? Yoga?
What I meant was that she knows that she can't blow up our finances and walk away without any impact. And actually, she's the one who's super concerned about money. Me? Hell, I've been poor, and if money was all I cared about, I'd be in a different line of work.
Her words will let you know how she feels. Her actions will let you know what she thinks. Be aware of what works.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
The girls will stay with her in the house. I'll come in the morning when W leaves for work, get them ready for school, and drop them off. W will have them after school except for Sunday, when they'll spend the day and night with me. When I have more furniture etc, I'll have them 50%.
I swear being on the other side is just as tormenting as being a LBS. Constantly weighing reasons to stay. Being afraid of change. Being worried about kids, money, loneliness.
I swear being on the other side is just as tormenting as being a LBS. Constantly weighing reasons to stay. Being afraid of change. Being worried about kids, money, loneliness.
Don't I know it. But like you said (and I'm saying this over and over as well) You deserve to be loved. You deserve a normal relationship. So right now do you.
The girls will appreciate seeing a very strong daddy who loves them. It may not be immediately obvious, but you will notice it in the long run.
"I feel like Rocky in the fifteenth round, beaten beyond recognition, when I realize, the only person I've been fighting for is...myself."
You are doing so good. You already know to expect these down times. Don't let them control you and throw you off track. You are handling this admirably. It's the hardest thing any of us have had to do. Let the emotions out and feel them.
Then........Back to work!
God bless you, Pin. You are helping other people so much even while you are hurting yourself. Listen to your own, well thought out advice. It sure has helped me.
