Thanks for your feedback (Cas, thanks for your lengthy reply last week on your thread)!......and great to be back with all of you again! I missed you all!
Catching up on the last week.........I visited with the handwriting expert last thursday for 1 1/2 hours. She was fabulous! We looked at the package and contents (i.e. "He's Just Not that into You" book) from the anonymous sender under her microscope. She gave interesting feedback about the package (the label was printed with an inkjet printer, not a laser printer, there might be 2 hairs, not just 1 hair stuck in the tape, there appeared to be small chunks of chocolate stuck between the pages [more about that later] .........). She noted several distinctive similarities between the printed words in the package sent to me and printed words on the wedding card given to XH and me by his BMF. She said there is reason to think that BMF wrote in the "He's Just Not that into You" book sent to me, but would need additional writing samples to do a full analysis.
Interestingly, I played table tennis with XH tonight for 2 hours (we laughed and joked a LOT.......had a LOT of fun). Afterward we walked to our cars and chatted for about 10-15 minutes. XH said that he and BMF were friends again. I asked how XH knew that BMF was no longer jealous of XH and BMF's XW's friendship (sorry this is confusing and convoluted). XH said that BMF seemed to be OK with their friendship...........here's the interesting part............XH said that he had found an article that had OW#2's fingerprints on it and he had put it in a ziplock bag for me for fingerprint analysis (think there is writing on it too for analysis).....Then XH said that he would be seeing BMF tomorrow evening and could try to get fingerprint samples from BMF for me......So, XH must still be suspicious of BMF. He said that if he found out that BMF had lied to him about sending the package to me, it would really affect their friendship.......So XH is still suspicious of BMF.
I spoke with the forensic scientist today. I will be giving him the package contents (i.e. book) next week for fingerprint analysis.....I'm also testing the chocolate chunks for THC content (I know that BMF eats chocolate chex mix with cannabis butter).......so hopefully within a few weeks, I will know the answer to this mystery.........At this point I am doing the analysis for ME. I want to know who sent me the menacing package. If BMF sent it and XH refuses to see him for who he is, then I think it will be time for me to pull the plug on XH. Don't know if he would be capable of seeing how destructive BMF was on our R if that turns out to be the case............But that said, I have seen a handful of miracles in my situation...so I will wait to see what God has in store for me when that time comes.
I spoke with Jody on saturday. There was a lot of movement in my situation, so we spent most of the time catching up. However, she DID have a few memorable comments. Jody said that from her experience counseling it is her opinion that there aren't that many good, stable men and women out there. She said that from her experience, as XH dates more unstable OW that I will look better and better in his eyes. Jody said that recently several people that she has been coaching (like me) who have been at this with MLCers for 2-3 years, are beginning to see interesting changes (forward movement) in their situations. She said that she has been a DB coach for 4 years and it is her observation that MLC takes longer to resolve than many of the books indicate. (That seems like bad news for many of us here).
Jody also gave me pointers on how to interact with XH in my sitch. She suggested that the next time XH and I get together and talk about the anonymous package, that just as we're saying goodnight, I should lean into XH, give him a peck on the cheek and say "Thanks for taking me seriously about this anonymous package situation".........I did this tonight and XH didn't pull away or cringe or anything when I planted a nice, long kiss on his cheek....In fact, we BOTH hugged for awhile (longer than just a perfunctory hug).........After I got home, there was a VM on the home phone for XH (from Home Depot). I phoned him and we chatted a couple minutes.........then a bit later we texted back and forth a couple times.
.......so maybe this isn't total friend zone stuff after all........not sure.
Sorry this was so long...but I wanted to share Jody's feedback with you all.
