A message from Michele Weiner-Davis

[TimeHeals]

Not on anybody's staff, but I do have a partial opinion on this.

I don't know how or who you exposed to, so you're going to need to provide those details.

As for the general idea of exposing only the facts to those who will support your marriage, what was supposed to happen if you did that?

It was supposed to bring the affair "into the light" and eliminate all the excitement of the sneaking around and cheating. Done.

It was more than likely supposed to drive them closer together so that they began to deal with more real-world problems. Done.

If you have been just complaining non-stop to your own family members, then stop it. That's what you do.

The whole idea was "only the facts" from the onset.

Once you have exposed, you go into the protection phase: protect yourself emotionally, financially and spiritually. GAL is good for the first and last, and I am not familiar enough with your situation to know if you must do more to protect yourself financially.

Work on yourself now. If your spouse is willing to end the affair, then you have a new development.