There are intimacy and secrets on Doc's side, that is all that matters. IF Doc's W is aware of his Rs with the various women he privately emails and has no interest in reading them or in being in contact with the women that is one thing. BUT, I'm pretty sure all his Rs with DBers off the boards are a secret from his W. That is not OK, and at this point continuing to participate in that is not OK. It is not anymore OK than having regular lunches with a man in a troubled marriage who shares all his secrets with you and keeps you secret from his wife. Indeed, change the food for text, it is precisely the same thing.
And FWIW, I have zero interest in off-board communication with people here, that is why I changed my username years ago and have shared contact information with only one person since then.
