Unbelievable that she keeps testing me, even after she thanks me for holding her to the fire.
That was the first time in the history of our relationship that I got angry and she didn't get angry back, but rather showed remorse for bad behavior, and vulnerability. She's growing.
I replied to her e-mail that I'm scared too, and I am. In the past when I tried to put a strong confident face on our prospects, she would back away from me, because she could tell we were on very different pages.
As the days have gone on, I've found myself getting less and less enthusiastic about going away with her, or doing Retrouvaille. I am feeling good about my life. Do I really want to put myself through more h*ll? I was planning on calling her this morning to ask her to lunch so we can spend some time together to see how it feels. I didn't need to. She called me this morning, and said "The more time that goes by without seeing you, the farther I get from wanting to go away with you. Will you come out with me to a comedy club Friday night?" I think we're on the same page now.
