Faith

Maybe she didn't want to meet you in the park because she would have to be alone with you and that would feel like cheating on OM?

Maybe it's because her allergies are acting up?

Maybe because it's Tuesday?

Get yourself out of her head.

This is not a game.

If you want to use the dogs and hold it over her head just admit that is what's going on.

YOU have to stop framing your life around what W thinks of you.

Whether she respects you or doesn't respect you.

Find your own respect.

I don't know about you but I didn't feel so very good about myself worrying about what my W was doing to me.

As far as the other stuff up there.

Protect yourself legally and every other way the best way you can.

If you want a divorce. If that is something you see yourself doing. Do it.

If you don't. If that is not what you meant when you took your vows....

well why would you let someone force you to compromise your values and beliefs?

If you crumble from your honor and your truth you confirm all the doubt you have in yourself and every wrong idea you think your W has about you.

Figure out what you stand for and don't let ANYONE force, coerce, guilt, persuade, victimize,bully, or ball-bust you from your choice.

When you do that you will have your self respect back and it won't be a function of what your W has done, is doing or will do.

My goal is to some day be the person my dog thinks I am