I've been so frustrated with my oldest son (24) who moved out as soon as I asked him to contribute a modest amount to the household several months after he finished college. He said he'd rather spend five times that amount and live on his own than pay to live at home.
Y'all helped me through that.. reminding me that it's good for kids to be independent.. something I heartily agree with. The problem now is that he won't communicate, contact or reply to any calls, emails or messages I leave him. His phone works.. since I can see the activity on the bill which I pay for.
So.. he won't come around so I can sign over the car to him.. etc. etc. And I kinda had my fill of it. I'd been annoyed to begin with.. but... but... when I saw on the bill that he'd communicated with his father (at least enough to answer the phone) something just *blonked* inside. I just felt heart-hurt.. a major sense of disrespect.
So.. I sent him an email. I'm not even sure if it goes to him but it has in the past.. It went as follows.. (and no.. I didn't give myself the 48 hours, 24 hours, 1 hour review period)
Tom..
What is going on? I call, send texts and am ignored. I won't make assumptions on this behavior but need to set some boundaries.
I'm immensely proud and impressed that you're developing your own independent life. That takes a lot of responsibility and maturity.
But avoiding, evading, ignoring contact with me seems like the exact opposite.
If you don't want the car, return it. If you do, come down and I'll sign it over to you. If you want your cell phone, let me know or I will cancel it. If you have a problem with me, talk to me about it.. or not.
It's your choice. You're an adult. An incredible son I will always love but I'm done with this level of disrespect.
Mom
Good.. bad... just saying what was on my mind? Input, please. Ugh... I'm such a weenie at being direct.. but I've recently found that being direct is the best way to communicate..
