Journaling - Since H announced that he is leaving for a week to see OW, decided to call a meeting to give him the latest cash flow projections (really bad) and discuss how to make happy a supplier that is threatening collection. I was calm throughout and then at the end, without me bringing it up he started to justify his trip out of town...."I know that you probably don't believe me but I'm working as hard as I can even from there" kind of speech....I didn't say anything but must have made a movement with my body and that made him really angry and he just stormed out...leaving me sitting there. This is getting worse and worse between us. Later I felt that I have to address that and sent him an email. Here it is.
I really went into the meeting today with the resolve not to get emotional and to try to discuss things calmly. You are so defensive that no matter what I do or don't do you take it personally. When I shook my shoulders I did that not because I was disagreeing with how much you work...but because I was frustrated that you'd brought it up again for the millionth time...and you just blow up and walk out on me....
The issue with your trips is not about where you are going, but that you are leaving at all when we are in such a difficult business situation. Where we should pull together and support each other to get through this.
I was thinking why are you so angry with me? What did I do to deserve this? It must be that the anger you show towards me must make it easier for you....it probably removes some of your quilt.
I do get angry with you also, obviously for different reasons.
You have no idea how sad this makes me that the two of us (remember US?) are like this to each other....breaks my heart all over again every time I see you..
Have a good day
I'll probably get some 2x4 for this one.....
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
