Both of you have been pretty emotionally abusive of each other in your R history. She cheated on you and you kept wanting kids when she didn't. It does seem like when she felt you weren't listening to her, she went elsewhere. I mean she was the first one to threaten divorce so it's not like it was unexpected.
Have the two of you ever brought out all the issues on the table in the past?
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.