she has made her mind up and doesn't want to talk to anyone, go to anything, or even consider listening to reason, because she DOESN'T want anything to change her mind.
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Also I just noticed, she has been packing up her stuff little by little.
So has been buying marriage books, pushing a marriage help weekend and pressuring her to make up her mind been working?
Agree with her feelings. You are right this marriage isn't working, let me help you pack your stuff and help you move. Let her go, stop trying to be selfish and get want you want.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
You r right, I just wanted to get the retro in her mind. I didn't see it that way. Yes the marriage book was before I figured out the going dark thing out. But suggesting Retro... Damn I misunderstood. I am still doing thinks to get a reaction, obviously... But trying to go dark the right way... For me. It seems divorce is gonna happen, I just have to proceed. Gonna sign up for that mandatory co-parenting class I guess. And proceed toward divorce, nothing I can do and prolonging seems silly at this point. Going Dark in 3,2,1.
I have been where you walk now. My biggest fear was getting D. Once I accepted it is when my DBing really started to have an impact. I was more confident about my future. I know I would be OK.
This took the pressure off of W.
Stop telling her and suggesting to her to see things your way, it won't work.
I wrote this before:
"The only way on earth to influence other people is to talk about what THEY want and show them how to get it." D Carnegie.
Let go of your fear, it is what's holding you back.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
