So the lab partner from my other class wants to study together for the exam later this week. He said we could study at his place. Idk... Should I go?
NO! Putting yourself in a "it just happened, nobody planned it" position is asking for trouble. You're in deep pain right now and in no place to even contemplate a relationship or even a one night stand that could get complicated, he's your lab partner. I'd stick to studying at Starbucks or the library, make it somewhere public and be aware that you are susceptible right now and probably looking for validation as a woman. Be smart and take care of you right now, don't add to what you're going through. Happy studying! Btw, SJW can take 2-4 weeks to have any effect and therefore if it doesn't help you'll have to wait another four weeks after that for the AD's to kick in (don't take them at the same time!). Also, some AD's work for some people and not for others and you may have to switch so there could be that aspect to consider as well. So if waiting time is your deciding factor I'd go with the AD's rather than the SJW right now.
or even a one night stand that could get complicated
One night stands can be good. I prefer running during the day though.
Oh and don't sit next to him, sit across from him or too many accidental touching incidents can happen. Like his eraser suddenly landing on your lap or you having a trantula in your hair or him losing his balance and falling on top of you or him mistakenly thinking you needed a heimlich maneuver.
See even studying with a guy can be hazardous.
Happy studying!
Me: 35|WAW: 38|D: 6yo | http://tinyurl.com/2dxx7m6 Feb 2006, left, came back in two weeks Aug 2006, left again Apr 2007, filed for divorce Dec 2007, reunited Mar 2010, moved out, filed again
Since the split there was one night where I could have "gotten lucky," but then I thought I'd have to at least call a couple of times, do the fake dating thing for a while and she wasn't someone I'd want to introduce to my daughters anyway.
Too many complications.
So I called her a cab. I was pretty proud of myself.
Me: 47, Ds 17-13, D final 6-11 http://tinyurl.com/yk4e2tz http://tiny.cc/thread2 http://tinyurl.com/ydtphqu http://tinyurl.com/thread4 http://tinyurl.com/3sm78k6 http://tinyurl.com/thread6
Btw, SJW can take 2-4 weeks to have any effect and therefore if it doesn't help you'll have to wait another four weeks after that for the AD's to kick in (don't take them at the same time!).
Do you have any ADs you'd recommend?
Oh and thanks to all you men for the "man" perspective on (lab partner). I will suggest a library then. I love libraries
Originally Posted By: ImprovedRomeo
See even studying with a guy can be hazardous.
Happy studying!
Haha. That's kind of like "Congratulations" dripped in acid.
CTH, I am also very proud of you.
I'm not at the "dating" point yet it's kind of fun (and scary) thinking about the first time I do make out with someone in the future. Hee hee.
Hey Sol, During my first divorce I started taking Kava/Kava. It worked great, made me calmer and helped me sleep. I think its off the market now, have not seen it anywhere. Tried Paxil but its messed me up. So I turned to God, read some good books, conversations with God is a good one. Not sure who wrote it. Wish I caould find it in my house?
No problem. I was here 10 years ago when my first marriage ended in the D. I was a mess, more so than now but I'm still pretty messed up about this! Made some good friends on the boards and we even got together once in S fla. I was on the D-board at that time and it pretty much accepted my sitch. It was soooo hard to be around the newcomers who were there. So much pain and anquish. Lots of crying and heartache.
I had my shoulder cried on but my tears were not to be found anymore. You will get that way too. Right now I am still in shock that i'm here again. You will gain alot from this experience and after all the bad to good will come..
Btw, SJW can take 2-4 weeks to have any effect and therefore if it doesn't help you'll have to wait another four weeks after that for the AD's to kick in (don't take them at the same time!).
Do you have any ADs you'd recommend?
I'd go with an SSRI, Lexapro has a few happy customers I know, didn't do much for me but...gotta run!
I was on Cymbalta for a year but when I went off it I had some nasty headaches! (Could be bc I just forgot to refill the Rx, then realized it had been a week, and decided to go cold turkey. DON'T do that!!!! It says so right in the packaging...silly me!)
My neurologist put me on Amitriptyline for my occipital neuralgia (stabbing head pains cause by a nerve misfiring). I googled it and found it is also an anti-depressent. Then again, she asked me what stressors I had at the time and I told her about then-H. Turned into a therapy session! She commiserated about her unfaithful ex-H and told me to drop mine like a bad habit. Then she prescribed the meds. So, maybe she meant for them to serve two purposes?
Good job on sticking to a library/Starbucks/Panera. Much safer environment for right now. I hear you though on getting in a good makeout session. I had two or three good kisses with one guy and now I am trying to figure out how to have the next date and NOT have him thinking I want to go farther than that?? So playing it safe is definitely a good idea...
I want to get to the point where I hate H. Seriously. I think if I can start feeling angry then it will help me feel better soon. My womanly instinct tells me he is seeing someone. Idk why or what, but I feel it, if that makes sense? I hate that he is the one wanting a D, sends me paper after paper from his L, schedules a court date w/in 2 weeks and then we get there and...nothing. I know he is the one who delayed the hearing since he mentioned only going to court as a "precaution." Nice, huh? How the hell can he just move on like the last seven years didn't happen? Did I mean so little to him? I signed his f@*$!ng greencard and this is how he thanks me?
Sorry. Venting. I got an exam back and it was not what I wanted to score but alas, I will have to study harder. Have another exam this week too. Just so hard with all this crap going on in my head.
Does anyone feel depressed reading the posts on DB? Sometimes I do.