No where did I say I had all the answers T, I have had lots of questions though. And you have answered most of them.
Oh I know Lance, I wasn't trying to say that you did, or single you out. Just trying to make that point and the fact that we don't need the answers to everything. It is meant to be that way. It's a part of how we grow and it's directly connected with faith.
The further along you move into this, the less certain things seem so important as well. You will find that a lot of what your focused on won't matter any longer.
I guess it may just be me, but to place so much focus, labels and absolutes on mlc and the posts in the archives, just sort of strikes me as not completely letting go.
It almost has sort of a "understand it, so I can follow it to the letter and FIX it" sort of feel to me, however that just may be ME. I dunno. I just keep getting this "fix it" vibe. I do know one thing for sure, it can very easily become an unhealthy obession if you aren't careful.
Anyway, I want to get back to MHL.
Buddy I am three years into to this and still deal with a touch of sadness and even a little anger at times. I can't tell you when it will all go away. All I can say is that you are one special guy and what you are felling is completely normal.
Just allow yourself to feel the way you are feeling and CHOOSE POSITIVELY as to what you want to do with those feelings.
If your feeling a bit blue, then maybe it means you need to find a new focus, OR the opposite.... maybe it's time to get a little introspective with the hope and faith that it will pass and you will be in a stronger place tomorrow.
If your feeling angry (btw it's prefectly fine for you to be angry) then you have a CHOICE to number one... own that feeling , then number two decide what you want to do with it.
You can sit and stew in it, sling blame... you name it. Or you can use that sh!t in a positive manner. Use it as a motivational tool to light a fire under your ass.
Tackle that project at work, bust your @ss in the gym, the list goes on and on.
Many of the battles we face are with ourselves.
I can't say enough about you , Grit and Eric you guys are doing wonderful. Stay strong embrace what you are feeling and keep up the good work.
I completely understand when you say you've let go of your marriage of old and yet, these feeling are still there. I'd be more worried if you were to say that they weren't.
Again, you are doing an incredible job. Keep going!
