Are you active in a church? I found my MC through my pastor.
Yes, I am active in my church. Unfortunately, my church is different in that they don't send members to an outside MC. Instead they offer scriptural counsel. My husband has been advised that God hates a divorcing, but they can't make him stay married to me.
Anyhow, that brings up another issue. We attend the same church. We have been sitting on opposite sides of the church. It's a small group that meets together and we pretty much all know each other pretty well. Everyone has noticed that we aren't together. Some know that we are not living together at this time. Some know that he has filed for divorce. Everyone hugs me and tells me they love me and that they hope we can work it out. They do the same to him. These people are my friends, my family, my support group, but they are his as well. It's so hard seeing him there and not being able to sit with him, to talk to him, to hold his hand. Last night I tried my best to look my best, hold my head high, smile instead of cry, focus on the message from the minister rather than let my mind wander. Afterwards, when the hugs started, I started crying. I can't help it. I would give anything to get him back. So how do I pretend that I'm ok and getting on with my life when my friends hug me and I fall apart as a result?
Another problem is when I get an invite to go out, for instance to a festival this weekend. My friend invited me and then said...."ohhhh wait...your husband might be there". All of my friends are friends of his as well. I don't want people to feel like they are choosing sides. I don't want him to feel like he can't have support because I'm hogging our support group. Ideas? Advice?
Btw, I started taking Xanax and I promise it makes me feel worse and more depressed.
