WAH help please

[Oxymoron]

Well, it's been almost 4 months since the bomb and not much has changed as far as the R. H shows up every few days to do laundry and pay bills....sometimes he's friendly, but mostly he pretends I'm not here or ignores me. No phone calls, no e-mails. I have been working on GAL-making plans with friends, going out as much as I can, helping my mom with doctor appointments (still waiting for the prognosis after many more tests), and having PMA. No calls or e-mails to H. No snooping, no questions.

Feeling stuck in limbo land.

Although- I AM feeling more positive about myself and my life and my ability to move on. My mom offered to loan me enough cash to buy a house, so I'm going house hunting with a realtor saturday. It will have to be something very small and in need of repair to be in my price range, but I'm excited about that because I did most of the rehab on our current house myself. Found a lawyer who suggested mediation-I just have to convince H that's the way to go. I won't be able to maintain a separate household without the settlement from the D. I just don't see any alternative at this point, since H will hardly speak to me.

One curious thing did happen. Before he left for the weekend today he left me a note saying he was moving him mom out of the house that their family had used as a summer vacation home since his childhood. My IC recently pointed out to me that I did all the emotional work in the relationship-including talking him through all of his issues and emotions. On one hand, I feel bad that he's going through this loss and I naturally want to rush in and help him deal with it, since his mentioning it seemed like a reaching out. On the other hand, he hasn't once brought up my mom, or asked how she was doing with her cancer. I'm not sure how to respond, or if I should respond to him. Not responding in a 180, but there has been so little contact between us that I'm tempted to use that tiny crumb to connect.

What to do?