My walk away wife story

[pookie69]

Wow...

The idea of one OM gives me sleepless nights. Maybe 6 would make it easier to sleep?

One more and you would have a different dream for every night of the week.

Six gives you one nights rest each week. Oh who am I joking I could never keep up!

Humor and laughter are powerful painkillers.

[40andsadintexas]

Just when you think you have the WAW figured out she changes. Im not going to let her suck me in to use me as a punching bag, but she sure makes me scratch my head. We are 3 weeks away from our court date ( Where I hope and Pray she gets a life lesson) freedom is so close I can almost taste it them bam today she starts pinging my inbox, all about the kids but still strange for her. Later Im at the bank and hear honking I look up and there she is at the drive through honking and waving. I walk out of the bank there she is driving down the street honking and waving, when I pass her at a red light there she is honking and waving. You would think by now she would get it that she ask for divorce and she’s gona get it, I will not be friends with her I will be civil no more no less.

Below are the emails I did respond to good response or not?

If it helps you out any mom can pick up D10 and S7 from school just let me know. Also remember D10 has cheereading till 5:50 on tuesday


Thank you for the generous offer but I enjoy picking up our children from school.

Later

i looked at my schedule wrong I get back tuesday at 4:15. my mom will pick up the kids that tuesday from school if that is okay. I thought i got back on wed but its tuesday is that okay? you can just keep the suitcases at your house for now

If you're not going to be back in town in time to pick our kids from school then I would prefer to pick them up my self. I will bring the suitcases back tonight so they can be restocked, the twins only had one pair of pants each last time, and only 1 pair of shorts total, they need more socks and underwear also.

Have a wonderful day.

Next

40andsad

mom said she can pick up ALL four kids from school on friday, monday and tuesday. and you can just go get them after work. Also I will pay for the kids hot lunches those days just remember to check off ORDERING ON THE SHEET FOR TWIN2 AND Twin1 Let me know please and HAPPY BIRTHDAY

Mrs 40andsad


Mrs 40andsad,

Thank you for the offer, but I really enjoy the extra time with the kids. I am so very lucky that I work for a very pro family company, that gives me the flexabilty to be able to make time for our children.
Have a wonderful day.

40&sad


And last with no response

Sounds good!!! The kids cant wait for you to open up your b-day present

Whats she doing?
Someone please give me some insight.

[SpinFree]

Just when you think you have the WAW figured out she changes. Im not going to let her suck me in to use me as a punching bag, but she sure makes me scratch my head. We are 3 weeks away from our court date ( Where I hope and Pray she gets a life lesson) freedom is so close I can almost taste it them bam today she starts pinging my inbox, all about the kids but still strange for her. *details deleted*

Somebody's lawyer read her the riot act.
"If you continue to act this way, you will lose your kids and I will not continue to represent you."

Sudden changes of heart right before trial are usually seen for what they really are... (I am not a lawyer...)

SpinFree

[40andsadintexas]

I was kinda thinking that she was going to use my job against me in court and point out how her mom picked up the kids because I was at work. Her lawyer very well may have had a chit chat with her, hopefully too little too late.

[40andsadintexas]

Oh I forgot to say that she called me at work this morning and talked about S7 math grade for 30 minutes, I talked to her and kept her subject, tried to get off the phone 3 times before she finly quit talking. This all started off because she had a parent teacher confrence yesterday and did not let me know about it in time for me to be there.

Yesterdays email

S7's teacher has NOT called me back, I have already called her 3 times. Maybe she will call me today i will let you know, D10's math teacher called me yesterday evening and asked were D10 went to school and I told here and she needs some turoring for math so she wont get behind. Her teacher said everyone likes D10 and she gets along with everyone and is a sweet girl.... She did say D10 sits there the whole time and keeps her fingers to her eyes and picks out eyebrows and eyelashes. Her brother did the same thing and grew out of it in 7th grade. just a nervous habit so hopefully paige will grow out of it one day. Anyways twice a week her teacher is pulling her out of music and pe and is going to tutor D10 and I am going to start her tomorrow with First name and First name lastname for a hour. Tutor is also going to tutor S7. Hes just being a little lazy because he knows how to do his math.
Also D10 and S7 do 2 chores a night when they are at your house can you have them do chores. even if it making up the beds. also D10 needs to have her hair burshed out everyday, she does not bruch out her rats and I am always having to cut them out when she comes back home, they are so bad.
I am going to New York October 1 and thats the day you get the kids so you have to pick them up at moms. I wont be back till wednesday so you can drop them off at mom and dads Sunday at 6. If you want them to stay with you, its up to you.....

I have brushed the tangles out of D10's hair every morning that she has been with me, so I am not sure why you are having to cut the rats out of her hair every time I take her home.
I will pick all the kids up at their school on October 1st, I will drop off and pick up the kids Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. Unless I hear different I will assume that you are going to pick up the kids on Wednesday.

D10 is in cousins wedding october 18, i think were leaving thursday. The boys arent going thats your weekend, but let me know when you want paige to make it up

Paige can stay with me for make up time on October 22-24 2010.


40,
i have a in person conference with roberts teacher this afternoon. ill let u know how it goes. I think he lied to me about his homework again yesterday. I will find out for sure later.



Mrs40 Maiden name



S7's grades greatly concern me, I do not understand how a kid can go from an A honor roll student to a 27 in math in such a short time. I look forward to hearing what S7's teaches has to say about it. In the future on issues as important as a parent teacher confrence I would appreacate a call to inform me of upcoming events so I can be there too.


Have a great day
40


Thank You

[40andsadintexas]

Yea D10 & S7 got to spend the night with me tonight for my bday. I still don't know why stbex was honking and waving at me today. I think she wants to get in my head.

[SpinFree]

Yea D10 & S7 got to spend the night with me tonight for my bday. I still don't know why stbex was honking and waving at me today. I think she wants to get in my head.

You are moving on. You aren't available. This causes her fear.

SpinFree

[40andsadintexas]

You are moving on. You aren't available. This causes her fear.

SpinFree

I guess this is the part of the WAW that I do not understand. The longer we are apart the better I feel. If she was detached when she filed why is time making her look back.
I know this is the very foundation of DB but still do not understand how we could be moving in different directions. It just seems like time apart should have the same effect on both of us making both of us more detached.
I have had several people comment on how bad my WAW is acting, but I look at it as a gift. Her behavior allowed me to detach faster than many of the threads I follow here and saved me from much of the rubber band emotions that seem so common with the WAW.
I also think if my wife is taking a peak over her shoulder, that’s all it is. I’m 99% sure she is done with me which is OK because I pretty much feel the same way.
Yes I still love her, but I am not a pile of dirt for her to crap on. I wish we would have had a different ending put in the game of life you must play the hand you draw.

[pinhead]

I guess this is the part of the WAW that I do not understand. The longer we are apart the better I feel. If she was detached when she filed why is time making her look back.
I know this is the very foundation of DB but still do not understand how we could be moving in different directions. It just seems like time apart should have the same effect on both of us making both of us more detached.

It's not really that counterintuitive. Remember how you felt when you first got the Bomb? You wanted what you were losing. People naturally want what they can't have. It's also a control thing; when the WAS drops the bomb, they think they're in control. Eventually they realize control is an illusion. Depending on the relationship, they start to notice they're still attached to the LBS.

The key is getting them to the point where they notice this attachment. EA/PAs interfere with that realization. As does all the pursuing we do.

[40andsadintexas]

Picked up the kids last night and STBEX gave me a card, and a birthday present from the kids. I didn't think much about the card until later when I opened it, I expected to see the kids sign it ,nope Mrs 40 wrote me a short note and only she signed it.
I am not under any delusions that this is a major breakthrough in our sich or any thing else sometimes a card is just a card. But this week we have had some interaction that she initiated and this is new.
Probably just the closeness of our court date is forcing her to look at our past.
One thing is for sure I will not be sucked in to be used as her punching bag.
I guest the whole time I’ve been posting I’ve had so little to post about our interactions that I got jealous of every body else so I’m just happy to post about anything. :-)Most of the time all I get to post about is a new OM :-)