It's time to set us free!

[JTJ]

I posted this in gucci's set them free page and decided I would start my own thread.

I really was a jerk for the majority of our marriage. When she dropped the bomb it was a sledge hammer between the eyes and woke me up to the fact I was a jerk. I started working on myself and really started learning how to Love her and myself.

During this time she was and is going at one night a week and not coming home till 2:30 to 3pm. She started a new job in June and is working 3 nights to 4 nights per week. She would also go out 1 night and was starting to stay out later and later. 4 4:30, 4:45. The last time she did I had someone check up on her. She came home at 4am and lied to me about where she was. I didn't get mad and let her know that I new that didn't happen. She wasn't with anyone else. She just wants to do what she wants to do.

She told me how she felt I told her how I felt and she said "don't you think that this is the only way I can make you feel the way I felt all those years and get away from this.

She stated that she was afraid to tell me the truth. I told her I couldn't just be a babysitter anymore. She stated she didn't care and said she was done last year. She expects me to separate and divorce her. I finally had to admit to myself I needed to give her what she wants and I'm moving out in two weeks.

Yesterday she asked me if I was going to get her a newer car than she had and I told her no. Later in the day she handed me insurance cards we just switched to her insurance 6 weeks ago. I told her I didn't need them. She looked at me and said " so your not staying on my insurance."

I hurt her over the years. I've apologized and made amends. She is very hurt. I can no longer stay and be the baby sitter. I plan on moving out and separating. I don't want a divorce.

I would appreciate any advice. My thoughts are to give her what she wants. Separation and divorce even though thats not what I want. I'm already leaving. Is it dumb to set a goal of going out on a date.

JTJ