Wife states she is not in love with me anymore!

[HopelessInLove]

It has been a while since I have posted.
I posted once on WAW thread but no responses, maybe I will get more here?

I have read and reread DB/DR and N.U.T.s and I have to say a lot of good info. I have had a couple coaching calls and have felt very good talking with my coach.

She has given me some goals to draw boundries in my R because she feels W is just walking all over me. This has been difficult to accomplish. For example my older D has been avoiding younger D when she wants some affection (a hug or kiss). I had a convesation with the OD because she is being nasty. This happened yesterday. Today this situation happened again and W saw it. She told the YD to stop because the OD did not want to give her kiss. I got irritated and side to W she was undermining me with what I told the kids. W recoiled and told OD to give her sister kiss and that was not appropriate. My question is how do I state something like this without showing my anger?

Another thing my coach wants me to work on is not having any expectations or strings between W and I. W typically feel like I am doing things around the house or things for her and I expect something in return. W has been overwhelmed at school(her work), with the kids, house, and her health. She is to proud to ask for help, so last Saturday I showed up at my house after my kids were in bed and helped her clean the house. She was at first very upset at me, then she accepted my help for 3 hours and then thanked me and I left.The following morning she reached out and touched my hands and kissed my cheek. Last night we talked a little and she said she did not want any physical contact, because she did not feel that way about me right now and did not know if she would ever feel that way. Is she confused about her feelings?