She still maintains that there is no OM - just friends.
I have a few questions, if you don't mind. Were either of you still M when the two of you met? You said the two of you were friends with benifits. (I hate that term b/c that is what's use on those so-called dating sites.)
Anyway, I wondered if she left her first H b/c she was involved with another man (maybe not you...but another).
I suspose "uptown" society thinks that couples should have friends of the opposite sex and be free to contact each other "very often".... but I've seen it distroy M's time after time. I do not women can have that type of "friendship" with OM without her getting her personal emotions involved. Then the next thing is OM is "supporting" her feelings and then....well she's already in an EA before he tells her he feels the same way.
It's your decision if you do not want to bust the A. I used to be very strong about not exposing the mother of children. I thought the H should continue to protect her even if she's cheating on him. Since I was a W and mother who had been in an EA, you can understand why I felt the way I did. It took a long time for me to come around to seeing why an A should be busted. I have my own ideas of how to do it, etc. but if my EA had not be discovered, there is no telling how deep it would have taken me and how badly I would have ruined my life.....and my family's.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
