How should I handle MLC direct lying?

[amg2]

Twink: Thank you for the advice to take some time to "stand still". Well put.

TimeHeals: Thank you for reminding me that my anger is not ME. I have a reactive history and it is important to differentiate this.

Punkin: I don't rant, rave, ask questions, none of it. Smile and nod. I don't even need to grit my teeth most of the time any more. Who cares? Things he says don't really bother me. My composure is worth too much.

TG:I appreciate your help. I was a little hurt by your earlier post and your explanation means a lot. We are obviously in VERY different places right now. I completely respect your position. Maybe I even envy it a bit. It is just NOT where I'm at now. I almost feel as if I'm back on "the roller coaster", except this time it's b/c of MY feelings and potential actions. I'm not at all sure I agree with your statement

"Our M doesn't entitle us to anything. We are not entitled to anything from our spouses."

What then are marriage vows? Don't they entitle us to expect respect and honesty and love? If not the common courtesy and decency with which your would treat a mere friend or aquaintance?

WHatNow: Part of whats so weird about my feelings now is their NOT in response to expectations. He actually was contacting me more than usual, and that started to anger me because it feels like more of him thinking things are "ok". He told his mother about how he'd be attending a Halloween party with my family. Uh, no. That's something you traded in for your new life. Hope you're enjoying it.

So I realize I'm angry (which I actually didn't realize until talking with you all). I need to commit to this MONTH long trial which for me means "business only" and as little of that as possible. I still think I have my "runnin shoes" on, but time will tell. And it is scary to feel this about someone you've loved so much, for so long.

Thank you all