I had a phone call from her this morning. I handled it like business other than a comment about how awful she sounded with her pneumonia.
We got onto the truck and taxes. No progress and she's going nowhere asking me questions. Yet she got around to 'when are we selling the house'. I turned it back to "first things first"
Anyway, I've been watching another tread today. And it is appearing to me that I have been missing something and/or should be reviewing my perspective AGAIN.
Originally Posted By: J3B
Take all the games and tactics out of it, and no they really aren't games. Take all that away. Prior to all of this all this affair and seperation crap.
The guy who isn't (XXX). The guy you were, how would he respond?That guy...barring the crap you don't like about yourself and you should get rid of .....
That guy, you're going to be when you aren't (XXX)one day. The guy who read the man-books and liked what he saw, saw what he wants to become.
How would he answer?
Cause that who you are/will be.
Most of us here know how we would answer, or address this...but only one person here is getting those texts.
The why of what you do, sometimes just as important as the what of what you do.
Is this what feels so unnatural about what I'm doing now?
I know I want to be more "fiendly" to W as we all know she is in crisis, so to speak.
But I am torn on my approach.
1-Doing so would be more in line with the CD she fell in love with and the man I aspire to be once more but with improvements (CD v5.0)
HOWEVER-
2-Being that "positive" would technically be making the advantages of CD somewhat available to her
3-It goes against the dictum that "while she is in the A, I am not available as it is across my boundary."
4-It could delay her hitting bottom/ease her guilt
5 Taking a stronger lead in the Separation (as I am doing) is still helping her navigate through/clean up her mess.
Apologies but I feel I am at odds with myself right now.
