You can get phone records, install a keyboad divice, etc. But you've got to be smart about becoming a detective.
Originally Posted By: LasombraKnight
That just seems paranoid and dishonest for me. Even through all of this, I still respect her and her privacy. I couldn't snoop on her like that. It just isn't me. It also seems as though it would put us on an adversarial ground when we're both willing to work on things currently.
Privacy: closing the door to poop Secrets: keeping the poop from your spouse
One is good. (healthy boundaries) One is bad. (unhealthy boundaries)
(to paraphrase a PDT)
Trust is earned. She has told you that she is unworthy of your trust.
Personally, I would trust but verify. Find out if she told you the truth. (the whole truth and nothing but the truth) If she did, great no harm no foul.
If she didn't, confront and set boundaries.
She got a big sigh of relief by admitting her affair. She probably didn't tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth.
