With all the changes that have happened, have you physically changed a lot? Is your physical appearance less attractive to your W now - were you a snappy dresser and now you dress down? Were you physically toned before and well groomed but now you have let yourself go? Do you feel worthy of your W's respect? Do you feel worthy of your W?
What makes a M work differs for each couple, but what your W did does seem to imply that a sexual connection IS important to her - more important to her than it is to you. You need to make her desire you again. You need to pinpoint what it is you have lost in that area, ( and my guess would be your 'masculine edge' and your self respect). It sounds like perhaps you have so much guilt from the drunken night incident and your job situation, that you are going round like a dog skulking and expecting to be, (and thinking it deserves to be), kicked.
Man up would be my suggestion.
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
