"it's just that sex isn't the dominant desire for my wife."
Maybe it is. Maybe this is how she shows her sense of worth. If she has low self-esteem as you say, she might use the sex as a way of self-affirmation.
How are your day to day interactions? Any other methods of intimacy like hugs, touching, etc.?
Have you ever read the 5 Love Languages book?
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
