The danger is that key thing he craves (respect/admiration) which caused him to have an affair is still not back on track, so ... more work to do. But the good part is you still seem to have a lot of admiration left which is probably why you "settled".
Are you doing all you can to avoid getting stressed out that way again? And have you really explored this thing called "forgiveness"? After all when you went out and in a way "cheated" on him he probably sensed it - would you tell him this?
I can always count on fb2 to push my buttons ( )...
Regarding your first comment, I recognise what is happening at the moment between us but without sounding selfish, I think there is a lot of work to be done mainly from/om him. I cant say I admire him still, at least not even close to way I did in the past. I tend to see him as a man with flaws, and working on accepting him as such and consequently be able to forgive him. Working on forgiveness? You bet your a$$ I am. I am not there yet, it is VERY difficult, I certainly could not apply for the Mother Theresa award this year...(or ANY year)
Your second comment: I didnt cheat on him in ANY way. And that is not negotiable. I had told him my life has moved on, he read my emails dated AFTER the last deadline of Jun15th-17th 2008 and I have been very straight forward with him about it. Recently we had to talk about it, up until now he had said he didnt want to know anything. He asked a few questions and I answered each and everyone of them, not hiding anything, honestly and not feeling guilty or anything.
So, I dont feel he needs to forgive me. He may need to get over it but... tough luck! Small price to pay, dont you think?
The last few days I feel like things are moving very slow. I dont like that pace anymore. Hopefully something will change with his work soon.
My kids are showing all their hurt now (!!). THe y keep going back to the day he left us. I cant help wondering how that day will be talked about when they are older and what that means for their future Rs. K
)...
