So I discussed the issue and H says he told me where he was going and that he would have still been going there with or without ow. He thinks I'm making a big deal over nothing. After a while I begin to think I am! Anyway it was a no win situation so I brought it to a close. She exists. I knew that. he took her, as I expected he would. I think he took her to save face anyway. He says, let's just forget it and move on. This is not helping our friendship. I was not getting anywhere and only getting him offside.
I got the sense he was saying, "You can't control me and I didn't do anything wrong" but at the same time he was still trying to hold on as well without making any real concession. In previous times if I said something of this nature he would have been swearing and yelling and telling me to get lost. Then there would be days of anger or silence.
So in a sense I ate my words, pulled back and said sorry if what I said upset him but it was how I felt. He said sorry, too.
So although there was no concession on his part what I said will hopefully influence his actions next time.
Then he sent me a text to say he would pick D up for me so that was a bonus.
Am I just too much of a soft touch??
Upside...you're right...expectations are there and I've known that all along. If I saw that ow was with him I would feel let down but this was worse. He changed our arrangement to take ow to see his family. I think my expectation for him to be transparent is reasonable.
