My New LBS Reality

[Albuquerque]

IB,

I had my anniversary on Friday and I chose to not mention it at all. And I didn't hear a peep from H either. The general rule of thumb is to not discuss the R and I think mentioning the anniversary is a BIG R reminder. So I wouldn't mention it IMHO.

Be strong IB. I know the day will be rough but you'll get through it and will be stronger because of it. ((IB))

[irishblessings]

Thanks Up and Al - I know deep down that any reminder of R is a no-no! I will get through it - head down / moving forward!

[imLIN]

My H was dark and no contact with our 25th...on the 26th he was in town and we went out for a few beers and he asked, "So what are we celebrating?"...I told him, "Nuthin'"...and he sort of snickered...on of the few times I think he was actually thinking of us still married...

I wouldn't bring it up...just do what you want, celebrate your own hurdle and let it go...

Lin

[irishblessings]

So, I am sitting here with my 3 kids. Each of us have a computer on our lap. We are all laughing and sharing stupid things about ourselves and our lives. How crazy is this new world.

Tomorrow we go out to a nice restaurant and celebrate 25 years of the IB family. I am blessed.

[irishblessings]

Today, my MarriageVine posting was this:

The Intensity of a Vow
by Mike Mason



To keep a vow does not mean to keep from breaking it. If that were the case, marriage vows would be broken the day they were made. This is where a vow differs from a mere promise or resolution. A resolution, once broken, must either be forgotten or made again.

But a vow retains its power and validity irrespective of conduct.

It is not like the signing of a legal contract and not like any other form of human promise. A person cannot promise to love another person; he can only vow to do so.

A vow is a confession of inadequacy and an automatic calling upon the only adequacy there is, which is the mercy and power of God.

To keep a vow, therefore, means not to keep from breaking it, but rather to devote the rest of one's life to discovering what the vow means, and to be willing to change and to grow accordingly.

It might almost be said that the sign of a vow being kept is the realization of how far one is from keeping it. In a very real way, the vow keeps the man rather than vice versa.

This is what I believe. I played my wedding song this evening - "Always and Forever" by Heatwave. It upset the kids terribly. They really loved that song with it's meaning.

The real life...

[irishblessings]

OK, it's now September 21st - my 25th anniversary! Why does this mean so much to me? Because 25 years ago I married my best friend and we were blessed with the most amazing kids in the world!!!

I love my H and am so sad that he is in so much pain. But I am also proud of myself for keeping the "family" together and staying focused on the good God offers.

Happy September 21st to my friends!!

[seeking answers]

IB,
Yes, count your blessings that came from this special day. Embrace them as you would not have had them if it weren't for this day.

That is what got me through and I continue to count my blessings everyday. It keeps me off that train headed to Bittersville.

You should be proud of yourself, you've come far and are doing an amazing job of keeping all things together, including yourself.

Happy September 21st! Do something special for you!

[Truegritter]

Irish

You have a lot to be proud of IMO.

Happy Tuesday.

[courageous wife]

Thinking of you today IB!!!

Enjoy those blessings!!!

[irishblessings]

Thanks so much. It's been a tough day so far - but I'm trying to keep it in perspective.

I've not acknowledged the day with H. Talked about pros/cons with Ds and the cons were more powerful.

So I have written a card and put it away in a box.

Dinner tonight with kids and friends.