It's a challenge isn't it Albuquerque? Punkin, I have had patience in the past simply cos I haven't had a choice. This time I am trying hard to be patient so that I don't stuff things up. Prob a different sort of patience and one that society doesn't promote. We're told to just go get what we want.
This time I am trying to let H lead the way. So, it's all very pleasant and cordial but there's an elephant in the room!! Once I had the need to dissect the past but now I'm more concerned about the future. Trying not to get too far ahead of myself but what about our financial settlement? what about our divorce? The L keeps contacting me and I just want to tell her either to move ahead or to postpone for 6 months but I'm not game cos we all know with MLC that tomorrow could be a whole new story. I need to be ready......
Then there's this tiny panic that we can just keep moving along at this snail's pace forever and we'll be loyal friends and nothing more. ....
I know we're making progress but it's slow and I am tired. It's been a long journey and I need a rest!! There is a temptation to throw an ultimatum but I won't. I'll come here and write down my frustrations instead.
I'm waiting quietly. Soon I'll offer a DVD night or a beach walk. I'll see what happens with his parent's visit and right at that time is his birthday....no idea yet how I'll handle that.
So yes, I still need large doses of patience to keep me on track but perhaps the slightest hint of impatience to ensure this whole thing doesn't just stall!!
