I'm just going to protect myself and treat her with kindness, which is how I want to be treated. Is that empathy or just me taking control of my life?
_________________________ I wouldn't say it's empathy and it is not necessarily taking control of your own life.....but it is a good place(good attitude) to start moving on. Just be careful about being "kind" and see that it does not turn into being "doormat". There is a difference.
I truly admire a man who is confident in who he is and is so sauve, composed, and charming...and can treat people with wonderful manners....and at the same time, those people just "know" that they would not dare to do this man wrong! See what I mean?
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is it normal for the Wayward to pay for the Affair partner?
JMHO, but I think it might depend on her personality before she became a WW (and also on the OM's). If she has a tendancy to want to buy things or be the one who pays for the event, etc., then she may spend on the OM or the hotel. I do believe WW's spend on things that enable the A.....like buying new clothes, etc.
One reason for protecting your money is that WW's could make a number of irrational decisions that would wipe your accounts. The OM/A would no doubt be at the bottom of her reasons whether she spent directly on him or not.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
