Hi Punkin and Upside I have found that using the big 'stop sign' helps sometimes, but sometimes I just cant help it Feel like a ball of emotion sometimes...like yesterday and today.
Felt quite positive on Saturday, was feeling together and even a little happy, just living in the moment, and putting everything else out of my mind. Dont know how I got it right, because i tried to do it on Sunday, and the head was just not co-operating!
Despite having a fantastic day planned - went to see Mamma Mia with my BFF at the theatre, some of the songs ended up making me a bit teary - NOT what I expected.
And the rest of the day was downhill Couldnt for the life of me be cheery when H was around I didnt mope, but he could sense I was just out of sorts, and asked if i was ok.
He wanted to leave early in the eve, think I might have made him feel uncomfortable dont know As he was leaving, I cracked, for the first time in 6 months, and asked him for a hug. He said ofcourse, and gave me a hug. It wasnt a cold hug, but he was the first to let go, I could have stood there all night long
He said (a little uncomfortably) - are you ok, you seem a bit sad tonight.
And as he said it I couldnt help it, my eyes started watering big time, and I said yes, just a little hormonal right now...was the best I could come up with...
He hot footed off, and I quickly closed the door, cause I could feel the waterworks were about to explode...
I'm only human.
A little later he sent an text saying 'cheer up ' , and I replied 'trying to ' .
I know I must have won the award for worst DBing ever, but I just couldnt keep my emotions under control for the life of me.
I miss him so much. I feel like an idiot, here i am , feeling like an emotional mess, and he doesnt seem to have an ounce of emotion, apart from maybe feeling a bit sorry for me
I have found that using the big 'stop sign' helps sometimes, but sometimes I just cant help it 
Feel like a ball of emotion sometimes...like yesterday and today.