You can't have everything, where would you put it?

[awest1217]

As a teacher, I am sure D8's teacher will ask about what she can do to better communicate, but now that D8 is in 3rd grade, the responsibility will fall more on her. Also homework is a student/parent responsibility to get it done, not a teachers.

I recommend for you, if you are going and I recommend that you do, that you bring some of what you learned from DB about being solution-oriented to the meeting. Many teachers know how to do this, but when being attacked will forget. Make sure you try to be the "mediator". You may hate it, but it is better than a fight. Have ideas prepared for what the teacher could do to help.

I know with me, even in high school, with many of my special ed kids who are more severe, i am in constant contact with their teacher of record so I know what the student has done in previous years. I am sure D8's teacher is doing the same.

I know you don't like it, but ask STBXW in an e-mail what communication she would like the teacher to do before going to the meeting. Does she want the teacher to e-mail every night what the homework is? Is there an agenda that the teacher can sign saying D8 has everything written in it so you can look at that every night? Does the school have a website or a grade program that you can check where homework is posted (probably most likely location because this is what I do)?

I know you feel this is STBXW's thing, but you need to be a dad and since you are the one who is better at this stand up for your kid because teacher's are people too and when the parents are horrible...sometimes the kids suffer, not on purpose, but because the teacher doesn't want to deal with the parents. Or worse...you may have to move D8 again. Try to think about what is best for D8.