Baby born, separated, WH moving overseas for OW

[gatsby11]

Hey,

Good response back. I also hope he makes a lot of $$$ for you guys. It's the least he can do right now!

I'm glad you wrote a gratitude list and know that you'll be all right. You'll go up and down of course, but I'm glad to read that.

[Piano]

The gatitude list is for real. It's easy to lose sight of all we have in life, right?

I am waiting for the 2x4's, but I had a talk with my mum last night, and she really felt the most powerful way to demonstrate that I was "moving on" (even if at times I am acting "as if"), was to send some photos when requested. But only pics where I am also in the photo, for the time being. She felt, and I tend to agree, that if I was really letting go, I wouldn't hold back on a request for pics.

I thought that to be true.

So I sent a handful of me and bubs living it up.

[Piano]

I should also say I had nightmares all night about OW after doing that! So I think I really must have been acting "as if" I was alright with sending photos..deep down there is still a wound telling me I am not recovered. Which is normal. Despite what WH said about me "being stuck", it is early days in my recovery process.

[Piano]

G and BD, WH did not get the high flying job he wants.
If it means more financial pressure on him, then maybe that's a good thing. Bubs and I will work it out.

[fullmoon]

Hey Piano, I agree with your mum.
And I was thinking, I'd miss someone more if I see them in a picture and not just in update emails.
A photo or two will give you a stir in your emotions... it would with me.

[gatsby11]

Wait, so he didn't get that job? Oh, that's too bad.

I think you should do what you feel like, P. Whatever you think is best.

What is bub doing now? Is she sitting up? (I can't wait for mine to sit up. She's kind of a flat head, so I'm spending a lot of time propping her up so she's not on the back of her head. I did buy a chair that will do that for me, but she doesn't like it much.)

[newmama]

you know, the photos aren't a bad idea actually! Maybe just not tons and tons. A few. Your mom has a good point- when you see someone, it makes you remember them more. ALSO the OW willhave to see you IF he shows a pic of bub!!!!!! hahahahahaha! Smart!

Boundaries are easier for me to lay down over email or texts, lol!

tell us about bub's development- we want to know!

[Piano]

Thanks gals,
Well bubs is a chubby chops, and she's not doing much except putting her hands in her mouth, picking things up, babbling away...She's a happy little packet.

I am boiling inside.. got an email from WH who thanks me for the photos..comments on how much she has changed already and how lucky she is to get about.

Then he gives some detail of his pay, says he will provide more, AND THEN says he doesn't see how he can help me with my administrational thing because it would mean coming back to this country for a short while - and he can't see how he can do that before the end of the year.

I am so angry. I can't keep playing nice cakes with this guy. I am on the verge on sending him an angry email telling him what an a$$hole he is and get a lawyer to contact him in future.

Something happened in the last day or two. I am having trouble keeping my hurt and agner at bay -- I am trying not to internalise the pain.

I need to meditate.

[newmama]

maybe you are feeling different because you have reflected on the marriage and remembered some "cons" to your relationship... PLUS you resent the fact that he wants to hear all about bub and your trips with her...and he is on the other side of the world!!! WITH OW!!!!!

[Piano]

yes, it's all of that, Newmama. hugs for that.