When I first found out about my W's affair, I did everything for her. Then, I did nothing. Neither one seemed to make any difference in the outcome of our marriage. I believe that is up to the WAS to determine if they want to save the marriage or not at some point.
I do not really know at this point the answers.
For me, I never see my W and I reconciling.
There is always hope when all hope is lost.
Keep your hope if you still want your marriage.
I wish you the very best!!!
ME-41 W-33 M-8 D-8 S-4 D 5/17/2010 www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1961097#Post1961097