Right, I know - addictions: OW while still legally married to me, and possibly drugs. Even if used recreationally, very worrisome.
I don't know what other consequences I can hand him since he has moved out and gotten the fantasy life he thinks he wants - except to go to the L and act on the stuff previously mentioned: drug test, parenting class, anger management class, custody battle detailing his abuse and neglectful behavior, and of course, a hefty lawyer bill. He's getting a drug test because he's admitted doing illegal drugs. He's getting a custody battle and parenting classes because he's introduced S to OW (and been verbally and emotionally abusive to both of us).
NC I guess is the only thing. He must get a lot out of treating me like crap, luring me into reacting, and then pointing a finger to justify his actions. I will not give him this anymore, "trying to reason" with him definitely included - it becomes a forum for him to continue to argue and then blame me for being difficult. THen when I pull back he's Mr. Nice Guy and like you said all this is is passive aggression because more secrets come out. ONce I drop the rope and he can't play me, has consequences, we'll see what happens.
