Your use of "charade" leads me to feel there may be little anger lurking.
That's "stage 1" talking.
I know that you are close to your D-day.
CALM is paramount at this stage.
The common phrase I hear alot of right now is 'BE STILL' and feel your way through this.
The A is new to you. I know that feeling.
I am two months ahead of you.
Re-read what I wrote.
I'll rephrase.
Your boundary is "open marriage"
WAW is in an A
So, drop the HOPE, and it'll speed your return to focus on you.
YOU are the POINT of this entire process.
You are in the river of life. The current will take you along.
You can guide yourself around obstacles and steer close to the banks for scenery.
However, as Steady and I discovered:
1-You have to keep youe eyes OUTSIDE the boat (M) 2-fighting the current is "Fruitless Paddling'
You are learning quickly (I've seen a few of your posts to others) Keep in mind that, like me, quick learning also means you are experiencing the growth (which is painful) in rapid succession with no time to rest.
BE STILL, my friend.
Take some time to close your eyes to think and FEEL.
Thanks CD. Yeah. I'm a quick learner, but a procrastinator who has dragged out the application of the knowledge learned. Like a snail with an anchor attached. I can't do this anymore. Your post really made something click.
I will always hope for a miracle, but I have more faith knowing that I will be better off after this is all over. Time to pray for endurance and guidance to get through it. No more focusing on the hope of a miracle.
