I very much like, believe and respect in the teachings of MWD but IMO they are suited for the couple that knows they are in trouble and there is a joint desire to improve.
In many cases the WAS is done. Period. Sadly when a WAS is done things can get very ugly very quick. When thousands upon thousands of dollars are wiped clean, vehicles stolen and any assortment of theft and abuse we read about here each day happen one cannot DB. One can go as dark as their legal counsel advises but once things escalate to a certain level something has to give and it has to be DB. When my H wiped out 30K of our savings despite temporary orders being in place to spend on OW I didn't really care how I looked to him - at that point I simply had to do do what I had to do to protect me.
The odd thing is once all that settles down and the case is "done" it's amazing how things shift. 36 months later my H is now telling me he does not want me to file for the divorce (we are legally separated and I can file in about 8 weeks). He has take a job that will have him traveling 90% of the time (guess things aren't going so good with OW living in his house, lol!) and he wants us to talk about "our" problems and date.
It's unfortunate once again he chose to make plans FOR me and telling me after the fact... my point is no legal paper can make a person "done". My H was as staunch and nasty as they come and 3 years later I think he is perhaps seeing the error of his ways. He isn't doing anything different but for somebody who said for 3 years divorce is his only option he sure seems to want to stop the divorce now.
I am not sure anybody is ever done. Not being done though doesn't mean you can't be smart.
