Thanks for the link Lance. I have read that thread and just reread again.
What sounds so easy to do is for me, so very hard. I think past interactions with H prevent me from having any kind of conversation with him that could/will become heated. I am scared plain and simple to hear any answer he may have. I am frustrated with ME.
My main issue these days seems to be: What if he IS telling the truth? What if there was no MLC and he never really did love me at all? Sure that makes him some kind of monster in my opinion to lead me on for over 35 years but what if it is real? For so long I held on to the belief that this was all about him and not me at all.....his childhood issues...his loss of respect for himself...his unhappiness at work in a job he hated.....What if it was never any of that and truly that he married me and had children with me because I made it easy and he had no better offers????
I know I will never get to know the answers but the answers would free me I think.....
