A new beginning to an end

[ImprovedRomeo]

Sol, sorry to hear how you feel and I can relate to it. I was there too and not long ago either. You will get past all of this and your new life will start to take place. For now definitely look into the ADs and give it time.

I thought I had everything: a beautiful home, a hardworking H, financial security and feel I have NOTHING now.

It's very understandable to feel the way you do. This was your dream which was taken away from you. But the good thing is dreams are ours to keep and we get to build and rebuild them even if we have to replace some people in them. So keep your dreams and you'll rebuild your new life even better once you get past this hump.

Also, I avoided telling my parents that I hated my life even when I felt that way because parents will do anything when they see their kids are hurting. So definitely tell them how you feel just not that you're in a very very bad shape...I think they can tell that you are anyway. You can tell your siblings, your friends and us- most of us can relate.

As for people getting married and pregnant yes perhaps but at least all around me I'm seeing more and more people getting divorced these days. Just look at how many new posters come here every week.

I have no idea where to go from here. My self-esteem is low for the first time in my life, I feel inadequate as a woman/wife, I feel unloved, and sad. I thought I had everything: a beautiful home, a hardworking H, financial security and feel I have NOTHING now. I know this is bad but I have actually thought of ending all of this but I know that is not the answer. I just don't know where to go from here.

NO NO NO!!! You're too precious to even think that way. You're too good to let one idiot define who you are. It's normal to take a hit on your self-esteem, feel inadequate, unloved and sad. Unfortunately, it's part of the process but it gets better. Believe that! I know I'm repeating this stuff but I'll repeat it as many times as I have to until you start repeating this in your head.

You said you had a life outside of your H- start it up again. What are you doing to GAL?